Welcome to the world of the Shitcoin Minimalist. To put it simply, this is where chaos meets clarity. It’s a mindset, a lifestyle, and maybe the only sane way to survive this wild crypto jungle.
At first, I was just like you. Confused, scattered, and spiritually broken. My wallet looked like a digital landfill. I was holding tokens with names like $PEEPO, $SHREKCOIN, and $ELONSWIFTDOGE. Each chart told a story of heartbreak. Every pump felt like a missed opportunity. I was a maximalist… of everything.
(Just kidding. I’m not that reckless, but I’ve seen enough portfolios to know most people are.)
Eventually, I discovered something better: the Shitcoin Minimalist lifestyle. From that moment on, everything began to shift.
To be clear, it doesn’t mean I stopped buying meme coins. That would be insane. Instead, it means I only buy the right wrong coins. In other words, I stopped buying everything and started thinking intentionally.
The Sacred Tenets of Shitcoin Minimalism
1. I only hold three coins:
- One that already rugged (for humility)
- One that might moon (for hope)
- One that has zero utility but a killer name (for soul)
2. I don’t DYOR. I VYOR.
- Vibe Your Own Research. If it feels like a cult and the Telegram chat is unhinged, I’m in.
3. I never chase green candles.
- Unless it’s shaped like a middle finger.
4. I only invest in coins with websites built in 2006.
- If it looks like it was designed by someone’s uncle during a Red Bull binge, it’s bullish.
5. I avoid utility at all costs.
- If a coin actually solves something, the devs will eventually try to work. That’s dangerous.
What I Gained by Letting Go
Since adopting this lifestyle, I’ve gained something far greater than profits.
As a result, I gained clarity. I developed a stronger sense of purpose. Plus, a Discord server where we worship a coin named after a frog’s sneeze.
That said, it’s not just about laughs.
After years in crypto, I realized something important. If you’re tired of guessing, take a look at this post on the best crypto indicator I’ve ever tested.
While it’s easy to laugh at the absurdity, let’s be honest. Most of us are just guessing, aping into coins, and hoping for magic. In contrast, real investors rely on data, structure, and discipline.
That’s exactly why I stopped relying on vibes alone. As a result, I built a real system that helps me:
- Spot actual opportunity
- Avoid obvious traps
- Leave room for meme-powered moonshots
Ready to Stop Getting Rekt?
If you want to laugh and learn, or if you’re finally ready to stop checking your portfolio like it’s your toxic ex, then this is for you.
To help others do the same, I put together a free training that busts seven of the biggest crypto myths keeping most investors broke, confused, and stuck. In many ways, this is the beginning of becoming a true Shitcoin Minimalist.
[>> Join the Free Webinar Here <<]
The webinar is not just fun. Instead, it’s practical and packed with real takeaways. And yes, there’s a meme or two in there.
Inside, you’ll discover:
- Why “Buy the Bear Market” is total nonsense (and what actually works)
- What crypto influencers never tell you
- How successful traders and investors really think
Because it’s free and fast, this training might just save your portfolio. Possibly even your sanity.
Whether you’re a seasoned degen or just starting your crypto journey, this insight can shift how you play the game. More importantly, it can help you stop bleeding money into the void.
TL;DR
Instead of chasing charts, believing Twitter threads written by bots, or stacking coins like Pokémon cards, take a smarter approach.
Start thinking like a Shitcoin Minimalist with clarity, intent, and a bit of sarcasm.
Click here to join the free training now and stop getting rugged by bad advice.
Your future self will thank you.
Your current bags won’t.